Em Krützche, Cologne

I arrived in Cologne a weary traveller and decided to try somewhere special for my first night. Looking at my guide book I decided upon Em Krutzche because it sounded so lovely, and a classic, traditional place to eat even if slightly more upmarket than other places. I do not eat starch so when I order food I ask for it without potatoes. I have done this in many restaurants in my travels and it has never been a problem. When I asked the Em Krutzche waiter if I could have a little salad instead of the potatoes with my herring he exclaimed "No!" and was quite put out. He went on to explain "potatoes cost 2 euros, salad costs 6 euros, you CANNOT have salad". And with that he walked off without taking my order. I was absolutely shocked - why, I thought, could I not have a little salad and no potatoes? Did I have to go elsewhere to eat now? As I was considering this he came back, after about 10 minutes, and still angry said "OK - I have decided you can have a little salad with your meal". I was hungry and tired - I decided to stay and eat. The food was OK if not very filling and the salad fine. When I had finished service was slow, so I relaxed and waited until the waiter approached before asking to see the desert menu. "No!" exclaimed the waiter "You cannot have desert! The kitchen just closed." I said to him that I was dining there, had finished my main course, was waiting for him to come over and wanted to complete my meal with a desert. He refused. I explained that it is courtesy to ask a customer if they would like to place an order before closing the kitchen, but he would not budge - he did begrudgingly take an order for coffee. The final stage of this awful meal was the most shocking. I had received for my bill and laid my credit card on the table waiting for them to take my payment. An older man, I presumed the owner came over, and I wondered if he was going to apologise for the terrible service. He said "You! Go! Finish! Finish!". I was once again shocked - I WAS WAITING FOR THEM TO TAKE MY PAYMENT! How could I go any sooner. And why had they wasted the energy to be rude to me once again rather than taking my money? This was by a huge distance my worst dining experience in Cologne, and actually may be the worst restaurant I have been to in the world. And I've travelled pretty widely...