\"Holiday Inn meet Golden Corral\"
By A Yahoo! Contributor, 9/6/11
Arrived to a very breezy lobby and lots of smiling faces. Our check in went smooth but then we were ushered to the "VIP desk" where a beautiful girl who spoke little English tried to explain their resort coupon scam (ie., dinner on the beach is $200 but with this coupon its only $120, $10 off a $75 dollar bottle of $9 Penfolds, ect..). She then led us around pointing out several facets of the lobby and gift shop before handing us off to the time share pitch man who wanted us to attend a meeting where we would be helped to appreciate the value of a $10,000 vacation condo there in Punta Cana.
Ugggghhh - off to the room. Immediate mildew stench hit us in the face (which we got used to by day 3). Furniture was beaten and broken, bed squeaked and moved easily with little motion. Bathroom had mold/mildew everywhere and soap/washcloth bar was falling out of the wall. When taking a shower water goes everywhere and filled bathroom floor. Vents in the bathroom connect to adjacent bathroom so we could literally hear whether our neighbor was going #1 or #2 - nasty! 3 out of 7 nights we were awakened between 1-4am to the sound of yelling, laughing, and outright profane speaking "African Americans" who invaded the place for a wedding. Called the front desk 4 TIMES during our stay to complain, was promised they would send security, which never happened. I truly felt like pulling a fire alarm one night. That was probably the most disgusting experience of the week. The fridge in the room was well stocked for the first 4 days, then the rest of the trip was never restocked. 1/2 the TV channels were fuzzy and 4 out of 25 channels had spoken English. Pools were heavily chlorinated which I would rather have than the STD's. Naked children were allowed into pools - yuck.
Pool common areas were always packed full of people.
The Beach SEAWEED was overpowering. I know this isnt the fault of the mgmt but...Jesus.....it is the reason I will always look to reviews like this in deciding the beach I am going to drop $2500+ to sit on. The free ocean gear was wither nasty or broken and heavy duty equipment operated ALL DAY EVERY DAY directly adjacent to the beach at the community recycling plant. The constant backup beeping 6+ hours a day - OMG is this for real?
The drinks were ok - nothing top shelf. The FOOD was 5 out of 10 stars. It doesn't matter which "gourmet" restaurant you dine at, its the same ingredients - cooked in the same kitchen. Eat Mexican and get a burrito covered in cheese sauce.....eat Italian and get lasagne covered in cheese sauce..... heavily salted, tough meats, desserts tasted like they came from Kroger. Slow drink service - we would usually receive our drinks in small thin glasses around the time we were halfway through our meals. If it weren't for the coffee shop (high quality espresso, cool air conditioning, never crowded despite the max occupancy), perfect weather, and great friends we were with, I would have wanted to come home in 3 days.
But once on the beach, in your chair, under a palm tree, with the sun shining and breeze blowing, while blocking out the sound of that freaking beeping front end loader, and eyes closed so as not to see the nasty seaweed, it was nice.